A Good Birthday

photo courtesy of Dad

It’s been a crazy week and I can’t believe how long it’s been since I posted here. Work has been busy and my boys’ summer activities have come to a peak as well. We’ll get a couple of weeks of family time (if I can slow them down a little) and then back to school.

Was it good enough?
As the summer winds down and the return to the school routine looms ever closer, I always begin to feel a little sad and my thoughts usually turn to the plans I had in the spring. Did I get it all done? Did we make memories together, did the boys enjoy their break? In the past I’ve tended to be somewhat critical – not enough vacation time, didn’t finish all my projects, never got around to teaching the boys how to cook!

This year, I resolved to be more gentle with myself. In keeping with my earlier post about taking more “time out” for myself I’ve been rising early and walking, taking time for coffee outside, and reflection. During those stolen peaceful moments I’ve directed my thoughts only (ok, mostly) to the good, the positive, and increasingly toward gratitude.

My gift
On my birthday, I took a morning walk and focused on the beauty of the morning. I thought about the things I feel grateful for – my incredible children, our home, my neighborhood, my job (and its healthcare benefits!), our health, my family, my boyfriend and our extended families. Life isn’t perfect – I didn’t get the garden mulched, I argued with the kids – but I didn’t lose my house. I salvaged my financial situation because I simply refused to stop believing that there was an answer. That’s not perfect yet either but at least I have the chance to continue to make it better. And my roof isn’t leaking any more.

After my morning of gratitude, I have to say that I had a wonderful day. I went to work, went to the gym, had birthday brownies that the boys made for me and felt serene all day. What an excellent gift!

The future
I don’t know if I can produce the same feeling again on demand so to speak, but I think it’s worth a try. When things are stressful, when I’m feeling like I don’t want to get out of bed, will a few moments of gratitude turn the tables? Was Tuesday a fluke, or can I find serenity through gratitude when I need it? Will I wear it out, or get better at it?

When was the last time you sorted through all of the chatter in your head, tossed out the negative and reflected on the things you have to be grateful for? How did it make you feel? If you haven’t tried it lately, go ahead! Find a quiet spot and the morning beverage of your choice and reflect. Let me know what happens!